Why do we hate #1? In other words, why do some people dislike or even hate people who are more successful than they are? Do they want to be in their place instead? There are two possibilities: 1) either they are jealous, or . . .
2) They believe that that other person does not deserve to be where they are (in the top spot). Let’s look at both situations.
If you are #1 in a sport, chances are that someone else wants to knock you off and take your place. You essentially become a target. You have something that other people want or aspire to be.
An elegant and graceful player, Roger Federer is so good at tennis that he makes it look easy (it’s not)! Federer won many tournaments and was ranked #1 in tennis for 237 weeks. In 2007, there was a heated battle for the Wimbledon Championship between him and Raphael Nadal, a strong up-and-coming player. Federer won that year, but the next year, Nadal won it, taking over the top position in tennis.
The bigger and more successful you are, the bigger the bullseye! That’s one reason that it seems that the rest of the world wants to tear down the USA. The United States has been the most powerful nation in the world for most of the 20th century. Other nations want to take our place in the top spot!
Controversial and opinionated, Dr. Laura was #1 on the radio for many years. Then Sean Hannity started his national show in 2001, and over the course of the next 4-5 years, he knocked her out of her coveted afternoon time slot. I heard recently that she is giving up her show entirely. In the movie “Up Close and Personal” Michelle Pfeiffer’s character is a news reporter who works her way up the ladder and eventually replaces the much revered long-time TV anchor played by Stockard Channing. This is a pivotal moment in the movie and in Pfeiffer’s character’s career.
Don’t be afraid to pursue your dreams. Times change. People’s tastes change. In every industry or profession, the person (or company) on top today was once a newcomer (Wal-Mart overtakes Sears). There is a time when someone comes along and does better than the person on top. Perhaps that person is more ambitious, a better player, more adaptable, hungrier for success, or can overpower an opponent.
So why do some people hate the best? Jealousy is an ugly emotion. Why are some people jealous of other people’s accomplishments? I mean there are people who hate Oprah! One answer is that people who are insecure in themselves try to find fault with others (rather than be supportive or happy for them) and/or don’t want others to outshine them. Others don’t believe that the person on top deserves to be there.
Once, I was teaching a class, and I had to help a woman with an exercise on the computer. I could tell by her body language that she was annoyed that I had to help her. She looked at me and said rather haughtily, “I have a Ph.D. in this!” To which I thought (but didn’t say), “If that’s true, then why don’t you know how to work this exercise?” I had a feeling that she felt she should be teaching the class instead of me, even though I had my own credentials.
I would like to know if anybody reading this has had a similar experience. Can you come up with other examples?
Was somebody jealous of you and wanted to see you gone (in office politics, or sports, etc.)?
Were you in the #1 spot and someone came along and bumped you off? How did you handle it? Were you prepared for it?
I would love to know! Let me hear from you!
Too bad so much becomes competition. It is one reason I love the Four Agreements by Ruiz. It has helped me curb my green eyed monster and I have less problem with jealous people as a result